50 Things Your Kids Should Do Before They're 12

My friend told me about this.  It's a bucket list for kids.  I'm not sure why the things are supposed to be done before they're twelve.  And I don't know what everything means.  What is sledging?  And how do you play conkers?

I don't know.  I do know that my kids have done most things on this list, which makes me feel like maybe I'm doing something right.  That's always nice, isn't it?   It's so easy to feel like you're making multiple mistakes with your kids.  My one son said an extremely inappropriate saying at the dinner table tonight in front of his friend.  This seems to be a fairly regular occurrence, so in many ways I feel like an 'epic fail' (as the kids would say) as a parent.  But at least I've introduced my kids to nature and luckily they've fallen in love with it.  They might never have perfect manners (who does?), but hey - they love a good hike! 

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/life/parenting/young-children/children-health/bucket-list-for-kids-50-things-to-do-before-theyre-12/article2409207/page2/

Who's In The House?

There is a popular song out right now called 'Party Rocker in the House'.  The truth is that I don't even know if that is the right name.  I'm completely out of it.  I'm old.  I'm a parent.  What do you want?  That is what my kids call it, anyway. 

Well, the boys were having a great time coming up with other, extremely appropriate (aren't they always?) words to go with the song.  Their favourite was 'Party Pooper in the House'.  That struck them as very, very funny.  They are boys, after all.  These are the kids who think the word 'butter' is hilarious.  Any male probably doesn't need an explanation.  But for you girls out there, yes, it's because it has 'butt' in it.  All you have to do is say 'butter' and they roll around on the floor laughing.  Try it sometime.  Don't get them started on 'assembly', please. 

After seeing my boys laughing so hard, I told my husband that I'd just had an interesting glimpse into the male psyche.  He replied, "What male psyche?"

Anyway, my daughter wanted to get in on the action.  So she made up a song entitled, aptly enough, 'Princess Is In the House Tonight' and the words were, 'we're all going to be best friends forever and ever and all be happy together'.

Boys.  Girls.

Amazing.  Different!

Who's Stupid Enough To Fall Into a Giant Hole?

At my children's school, there is a little bit of forest around the playground with some trees and bushes.  And I do mean a little bit; it's a very small area.  However, the children have been told they aren't allowed to play in this area during school hours.  The rationale is that the children can't be seen so it's not safe.  I understand - I do.  But I think it's too bad that the kids can't play there.  The bushes and trees make a great fort with trails through it, and there are branches and stumps and things that inspire fun imaginative play.

However.  Safety comes first, I guess.

Then the boys started digging in the sand of the baseball diamond.  They had a great time.  They dug a huge hole in the sand and they played various scenarios with it.  I think you can see this coming, but now I hear that the school is going to hire a landscaper and change the sand into sod so no one can dig in it.

My son was upset when he found out about it.  He said with annoyance, "I mean, come on!  Who is stupid enough to fall into a giant hole?"

Unfortunately there are people out there who are stupid enough to fall into a giant hole.  You know who you are.  I mean, I'm not going to lie to you, it could be me.  But I would feel REALLY embarrassed for being so stupid!

And I understand the safety concerns that the school and the board would need to address.

But I also think that if we continue to sanitize the outdoors, why would kids want to play in it?  If we want them to be captivated by the outdoors and not be addicted to video games, we need to make them realize the outdoors is fun.

We need to relax the rules.  We need to let the kids explore!

Why not think outside the box?  We could have an area with a little fence around it in which children could dig holes.  We could have a monitor watch the kids in the itsy bitsy tree/bush area. 

Let's let the kids have a little fun, people!

Who's The Parent Here?

I remember the exact moment I had the epiphany.  I was in the park with my boys, and they were climbing this great big old tree with perfect, wide curving branches.  I remarked, "I used to love to climb trees, you know."

My oldest son said, "Well, why don't you anymore?"

I thought for a second.  He's right.  Just because I'm an adult, that doesn't mean I should stop doing the things I love to do.  So I hopped right up in the branches and climbed way above my boys (not that I'm bragging, or anything).  I started being a bit obnoxious, yelling, "Wow.  What a great view up here!  Look how high up I am."  My sons probably regretted encouraging me at all.  But I loved it.

Yesterday the boys and I were playing at a creek.  The boys walked in the creek and threw sticks and rocks in the water.  We all practiced walking along fallen logs, which I especially love.

I've also started playing at the playground.  I think, 'Why sit on the bench and watch when I can be part of the fun?'

So I swing on the swings and climb on the climbers.  Once I was standing at the top of a climbing structure when an adult walked by with his dog.  He called to me, "It's hard to tell who are the kids and who is the adult!"

Exactly.

You're Okay. I Promise.

I was in the schoolyard when the bell rang.  A little boy in my daughter's JK class started running to get in line.  He tripped and fell.  He was crying because he'd skinned his knee.  His parents must have left or were far away, because no one was comforting him.  So I went over to him and rubbed his back. 

When he looked at his knee and saw a little bit of blood, he became even more upset.  I said encouragingly, "You'll be okay."

He looked up at me and choked through his sobs, "But what if I'm not okay?"

It broke my heart.  Instantly I assured him that I knew he would be okay, that I was positive.

That seemed to make him feel better.  I passed him along into his teacher's hands and went on to work, thinking sometimes we all need someone to let us know we'll be okay.

The Man Hug

I've said before that my nine year old son won't let me hug him anymore at school.  I was hugging him this morning at home, thinking he really needs affection since he's older and doesn't often sit on my lap anymore.  I was really getting into it, holding him tightly and cuddling, trying to make up for it.  I was thinking we're at home, which would obviously make it acceptable.  I was thinking my poor, affection-starved boy must be thrilled that his mom is giving him some love.

However, as always I turned out to be completely clueless.  Why is it we know everything until we become parents ourselves?  He endured a few minutes of my enthusiastic hug, and then he stepped away from me so we no longer had body contact, thumped me briskly a few times on my back, and muttered, 'Man hug' before walking away.

I was speechless.  A 'man hug'?  Really?  How is that even in your vocabulary?  But mostly I was thinking, 'You do not 'man hug' your mother'! 

There's got to be a way around this.  I will figure it out.  I'll get back to you when I do.  (Don't hold your breath.)

March Break Fun!

We had a hockey tournament in Niagara-on-the-Lake during our March Break.  The hockey was an exciting roller coaster ride of emotions.  And yes, there was a moment when I wanted to smack one of the other parents.  With deep love, of course.  But I took a deep breath and refrained.  And there were moments that took a few years off my life.  But there were also exhilarating times. 

The team bonding was even better.  Getting to know all the parents and children more was the best part of the whole tournament.  It was like a mini-vacation because we went to Niagara Falls as well, which is always fun.

We had a great moment one day in Niagara-on-the-Lake.  My husband and I went to a winery and did some wine-tasting while the kids ran around outside among the vines.  Then we took them to the park after a stop in town to buy chocolate and coffee.  It was a beautiful day; the sun was shining.  The kids were playing happily on the playground.  My husband and I were sitting on a bench.  I was eating chocolate, and it was good chocolate, too: dark chocolate almond bark with sea salt.  I highly recommend it.  It's a fabulous combination.  I was drinking my coffee between bites of chocolate; enjoying the sunshine on my face and the breeze in my hair.  It was a beautiful thing.

As a parent I've learned to take advantage of every moment like this, because you know that any second the kids will start fighting or someone will fall and start crying.  Or one of the kids will give the other one a wedgie, or a noogie.  Maybe that's just my kids.  Anyway, you have to take it all in and save it up as a great memory.  Ahhh.....