Stop It, Mommy!

Once you're a mom, it's hard to turn off that mom voice.  Even when you wish you could.  Even when you can tell that you're annoying your child, but you just can't stop!  Heck, sometimes I'm annoying MYSELF, and I still can't turn it off.

I know I can't keep my children in bubbles, and I know they need to make mistakes in order to learn.  So why is it so hard to let them do it, then?

I think it's because we're also supposed to protect our children; that's our job too.  And I love my children so much that it's hard to see them hurt themselves or fail something.

They're young yet, as well.  I hope the 'letting go' will happen more when they're teenagers....because I need several years to practice!

My oldest son (eight) was at a track meet, and I was there to watch him.  I kept bugging him about drinking enough fluids so he wouldn't get dehydrated, and he kept brushing me off (rolling his eyes and walking away).  But I was persistent, unfortunately for him.

I followed him around, holding out his juice box.  "How about some apple juice?"  I suggested brightly.  "What about water?  Hmmm?  Some nice cold water?"

I suppose the key would be pretending that I didn't care at all, but by then it was too late for that.

"You need to drink enough fluids...." my voice trailed off feebly as my son literally ran away from me.

Later on I noticed that he and his friends were lying on their backs, having a chugging contest with their water bottles.  They were each trying to drink the entire water bottle all at once; that was the game.

You'd think I would be happy that he was finally drinking something.  Sadly, no.

I rushed over and in front of all his friends I said, "Colin!  You shouldn't do that.  You're about to run and you don't want to run with tons of water sloshing around in your tummy."

Again, the rolling of eyes and the sigh.  Poor kid.  I can't help myself!  I'm going to have to learn how to bite my lip and keep my mouth shut.

The other day my mom was admonishing my 32 year old brother about wearing sunscreen, and he rolled his eyes as well, just like my son.  I guess some things never change. 

As I was leaving the track meet, without thinking I yelled in earshot of all his friends, "Bye Honey! I LOVE YOU!"  

Oops.

Turning Forty - It's All Good

Today is the big day.  I'm officially 40!  And the sky has not fallen.  Everything appears normal.  In fact, I feel good!  Maybe not James Brown good, but still good.  Great, even!

We just had a party last Friday night, and I had a great time.  We danced until 2 a.m.; I had so much fun.  And I felt fine the next day, too, which was a relief - I mean, completely expected.

My son asked why my friends had left their cars parked in front of our house.  "Ummmm.....they're being environmentally friendly?"

I thought 39 was going to be the hardest, and it was.  Maybe that seems funny, but to me that was when I realized I was at the end of my thirties, that this was the last year of them and that was it.  And I got used to that, and now I'm ready to face my forties.  Head on, or at least with the help of a little red wine!

I think it helps that I'm very happy with my life right now.  I'm very happy with my family and my house, and I like my job.  Also I'm probably the fittest I've been.....ever.  I'm going to run another 25K soon and I'm training for a try a tri - a mini triathlon.  I feel like I've got some good momentum going.

As you get older you get more comfortable with yourself.  You accept who you are and you don't care as much what other people think.  Next year all of my children will be in school.  I have a little more independence and I can do things like staying up until 2 a.m., dancing and having fun with my friends.

At one point my husband asked me anxiously, "It's okay if I play hockey on your birthday, right?  The game isn't until 11:15 p.m. so you'll be in bed then anyway...right?" 

I looked him right in the eye.  "At 11:15 p.m. on my birthday, I might be curled in a ball, lying in a corner sobbing for all you know!" I informed him frostily.  My husband looked terrified.  I should say that my husband is three years younger than me, darn him.  Anyway, it's okay.  I will not be that person sobbing in the corner.  I'm content.  Bring on my forties!  Let the adventure begin!