Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Moms Can Totally Be CEOs!



I was thinking today that moms can totally be CEOs.  We definitely have the skill-set.  We handle high-level negotiations and multitask like no one's business.

Picture picking up the kids after school.  You immediately enter into no-holds-barred, every person for herself discussions.  For example, I have three kids. 

Whose turn is it to have a play date?  Who has been invited where?  Is Child A grounded from play dates?  If Child B is invited to another child's home, are you able to co-ordinate pick-up of that child while also supervising your other child's play date being picked up at a simultaneous time?  And frankly, do you even have enough seats in your car to accommodate all these kids?  And what if Child C absolutely has to pick up his Magic cards PRIOR to his play date with Friend Z? 

Suddenly you realize that Child B has hockey, and that you have to sort out the play date mess, get each child where they are supposed to be, and then make dinner ASAP in order to get him to hockey, on time and fed.  Do you even know what you're making for dinner?  Most. Likely. Not.

Every day when I'm about to pick up the kids from school, I have to strengthen myself mentally in preparation for the emotional warfare that I will soon encounter.  "But I'm not grounded TODAY off play dates, Mom!  That was yesterday."   (Who the heck knows?  Not me.  I can barely remember what I ate for lunch.)

"But it's MY turn for a play date and Friends W, X, and Y are all busy!  Don't they know it's MY TURN?"

"Carly is too shy for a play date today but what about one a week from tomorrow?"

It's not just play dates, either.  It's just all the general activities that go with children who are older and are into sports and music.  It's like a math problem.  (I've always HATED math problems.)

Child A has hockey at Arena Z at 5:15 p.m..  If Child B has hockey at Arena X at 6:00 p.m., and yet you have to pick up Child C from her dance class at 6:30 p.m.(and remember you promised her a hot chocolate after her dance class) and then pick up Child A from hockey, do you have any sanity left to work on homework and do your own workout?  (Wait: you forgot that Child B needs extra prep time to get on all his goalie pads.  You fail.)

There are (epic) fails, but mostly you manage to get each child where s/he needs to go, fed and with homework done.

The boardroom would be a piece of cake.

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